need help

Its so easy to cover everything with a smile n a funny face

Insomnia getting from bad to worst 

gonna go see a psychiatrist soon when i find the time. 

there is sooooo much inbuild anger and dissatisfaction within me ..i cannot pin point the problem and my conscience mind cannot understand it.

after breaking up i realise there is so much emptiness within
the loneliness is just too much for me to bear. it scares me to the core.
i struggle to fill the hole in my heart with such exasperation akin a fish gasping for breath out of water.

i have not lost my mind just going to understand it better with the help of a professional.

these few days i have done unspeakable things n hurt myself so much more than before.

i'm sorry for not being the perfect daughter, friend and lover that u have wanted me to be.

i expect too much from myself i think.

and i tot growing up would be easy after the teen angst years.


*anybody wanna recommend me a good doctor in penang?