'Unrest' needed to pick up the pace

Unrest (2006)
Starring: Corri English, Scot Davis, Jay Jablonski, Joshua Alba, Derrick O'Connor, and Marisa Petoro
Director: Jason Todd Ipson
Rating: Six of Ten Stars

A medical student (English) tries to unravel the mystery behind why everyone who handles a cadaver in the pathology lab turns up missing or dead... before she becomes the next victim.

"Unrest" is mostly an effective horror film that is one of the better iterations of the Japanese Inscrutable Angry Ghost That Can't Be Placated Or Stopped No Matter What You Do school. It benefits from an inherently creepy locale--a gross anatomy class and the cadavers that go along with it--and a more-interesting-than-usual Pretty-But-Suffering-With-Some-Sort-of-Mental-Truama first-year student, played here by Corri English. The notion of a psychic atheist who has to deal with a curse brought down by angry spirits and/or an ancient god is pretty a pretty neat element. The escalating supernatural events in the hospital as the are also very well handled, with some supremely creepy death scenes, and a chilling finale involving a cadaver storage tank. The filmmakers also effectively deploy every tool at their disposal from lighting to color scheme in the scenes, to camera angles and cuts, to sound design, in order to heighten the terror as the film goes on.

And even more praiseworthy, this is a film that ends when it's over. While it's got the nicety of a denouement, it is blissfully free of that non-shocking shock ending that plagues so many horror films. Sadly, as this movie was made in 2006, too many horror filmmakers still haven't realized that tacking a nonsensical "final scare" onto your story is ineffective and lame. But at least writer/director Jason Todd Ipson got it right here.

Unfortunately, for all its strengths, the film also has its weaknesses. The biggest is the question as to why our lovely med student continues to live in the hospital, with the growing number of supernatural events and outright murders taking place. The filmmakers try to address this question, both by raising it and attempting to provide rationales, but in the end, the answer boils down to "because if she doesn't, the story will grind to a halt, so just don't worry about it, 'kay?!"

Also, while the film has some great peaks of terror, its quiet moments are REALLY quiet. Too quiet. And not in a good way. They run a little too long, and they become a little too boring. The creepy mood never lets up, but more than once I found myself wishing that they'd get on with the angry ghost stuff, especially after the mystery of who the haunted cadaver was, and what the nature of the haunting, had been revealed. It's not so much that the film is padded, but more that some scenes just go on for too long.

If you like "The Grudge" films, or movies like "The Ring" and "One Missed Call", I think you'll like "Unrest". If Japanese horror flicks and their Americanized counterparts leave you an urge to do the dishes, you should skip it.

'Tied in Blood' is an excellent ghost story

Tied in Blood (2012)
Starring: Paul McEwan, Kenneth G. Hodgson, Laura O'Donoughue, Chris Leach, Denise Cooke, and Amie Morris
Director: Matthew Lawrence
Rating: Eight of Ten Stars

Robert (McEwan), a talented professional medium who resorts to phony seances to keep the money flowing when his gift fails him, is asked by a desperate man (Hodgson) to banish the ghost that killed his family. Robert jumps at this chance to use his gift to genuinely help someone, but when he arrives at the haunted house, he is confronted not by the expected malevolent spirit but instead by the confused ghost of the murdered family (Cooke, Leach, and O'Donoughue). As Robert speaks to them, attempting to help them "cross over", a story of ghostly seduction, demonic rage, and deep, dark secrets emerges.

"Tied In Blood" is a slow-burn horror story that is more literary in its feel and execution than most movies you'll see. The horror here doesn't ultimately come from special effects gore splattering everywhere but from the darkness within the characters and how it got there.

The film can be compared to a dark and twisted version of "Ghost Whisperer". The protagonist spends the film communicating with the spirits of the dead in order to help them find peace so they can rest, while trying to prevent the living from screwing up his efforts by reminding the spirits of whatever grief or regrets are keeping them trapped between life and the afterlife. It can also be compared to "Rashomon" or "Five Times That Night" in that we're presented with different, wildly varying accounts of the same series of events, with the truth (or as close as we'll ever get to it) finally emerging at the end. And with "Tied In Blood", it's a horrible truth.

Screenwriter David Ross and director Matthew Lawrence paced the film expertly, producing a lean, straight-to-the-point movie where every scene and every line spoken plays into the mystery of what happened in the house. There is no need here to rely on fake build-ups abd "gotchya scares" because there are plenty of chills in the script itself. In fact, by horror movie standards, the cinematography is rather plain and everything is brightly lit and seemingly cozy and normal... even the creepy abandoned manor visited by the soon-to-be-dead teenaged brother and sister, and the nocturnal visits by the ghost (Amie Morris) are mostly free of spooky shadows. It's a rare and, in case, effective approach that makes the unfolding events all the more disturbing.

The dispensing of the hoary tricks of gothic horror that have been in play since "The Cat and the Canary", this film instead rests on its well-crafted script and the performances by its talented cast. Everyone in the film gives excellent performances, with as much being said with gestures and facial expressions as through the delivery of dialogue. And nowhere in the film is the acting more effective than the interchanges between Laura O'Donoughue and Chris Leach who play bother and sister. Even before their true personalities and relationship emerge through the various telling of events, the viewer can tell there's something not quite right simply through the way O'Donoghue and Leach portray them. It's some great acting, and I hope to see more of both of them in the future.

The same is true of the work of David Ross and Matthew Lawrence, who make their screenwriting and directorial debuts respectively with this film film.

If you're a fan of well-told ghost stories and horror films that command your attention through characters and story rather than special effects, should check out "Tied in Blood" when it debuts on DVD on June 26, 2012.





(This review was based on a preview screener that was provided by distributor Chemical Burn.)

'Evidence of a Haunting' is a mess

Evidence of a Haunting (2010)
Starring: Jessica D. Fulling, Scott Evans, Renee Wiggins, Korin Medina, Christopher Cassarino, and Robert M. Alford
Director: Joey Evans
Rating: Three of Ten Stars

Six ghost hunters on a reality TV show come up against increasingly dangerous spirits in their final three investigations.

"Evidence of A Haunting" is another one of those movies that draws its inspiration from the ever-increasing slate of shows like SyFy Channel's "Ghost Hunters". I haven't seen many episodes of any of them, but if the reality show that the characters in this movie star it existed, it would probably be like a cross between "Fact or Faked" and the aforementioned "Ghost Hunters".

I say "probably," because while we, in theory, are presented with at least one investigation as it would appear on the show, and we are given clips throughout the film of the kind that would appear on such a show, we never really get a sense of what the show is actually like. I suspect it would be a highly produced, high-end show like "Fact or Faked," but the film never gives us enough to work with to know where the characters fit on the hobbyiest to successful professional spectrum.

This problem could have been fixed if a little more time had been spent on the script in the character development department. The characters really needed to be explored more, as did their place in the world.

And if that had been done, maybe the filmmakers would have realized that their film was lacking in a consistent tone, or any sort of cues to the audience that the film would be shifting between "documentary"/"cinema verite" style and a regular, plainly fictional film, and eventually completely abandoning the conceit that we're watching footage culled from the team's final investigations.

A problem that no amount of improvement in the script, or a more consistent story-telling style used, would have fixed, is the wide variety of acting talent on display from the cast. A couple of the stars do almost professional-level work, but the majority of the cast are so wooden you almost have the feeling they were only making the movie because their families were being held hostage somewhere.

All in all, a film you can probably skip.

'Ghost Whisperer' got off to a strong start

I was gifted with Seasons 1 and 2 of "Ghost Whisperer" some time ago, and I recently got around to start watching them. So, I will be reviewing the episodes in this space. I only watched the show once in a blue moon during its five year run on CBS, but every time I did, I was impressed by Jennifer Love Hewitts two great talents. She's also quite an actress.


Ghost Whisperer (Untitled Pilot Episode) (2005)
Starring: Jennifer Love Hewitt, David Conrad, Aisha Tyler, and Wentworth Miller
Director: John Gray
Rating: Eight of Ten Stars

Her entire life, Melinda (Hewitt) has been able to see and communicate with ghosts. As she grew up, she began to pass messages from them to the living, so the restless spirits would feel relieved of their earthly duties and finally be able to move onto the afterlife. Even on her wedding night, she spends time with both the living and the dead... when for the first time one of the dead (Miller) invade her very home in search of help.

"Ghost Whisperer" got off to a strong start with its 2005 pilot episode. A deftly written script that introduces us to likable newly-weds Melinda and Jim--she sees dead people and tries to help them move onto the next life, he is a paramedic and tries to help people stay in this one, which is an interesting arrangement that I'm sure will get play as the show unfolds--and Melinda's sassy employee at the antique store she runs. I expect Melinda's doting and supportive husband will give rise to nearly as many plots as the ghosts he will help as I watch this series... and I expect her employee will come in at a close second, probably not directly but rather through antiques that she brings into the shop that Melinda owns and operates.

The pilot also presents what I know to be the show's formula from what few I've already seen: Melinda encounters a ghosts here and there, but one or two become her focus. After some initial sleuthing and plot complications, she finds the key to helping them resolve the issues that are keeping them in this world. After a tearful goodbye with family members and loved ones, the ghost moves on, and Melinda returns to the arms of her loving husband.

But the pilot also features a near-perfect mix of sappy and creepy that made the best episodes of the show that I've seen so much fun. Just when you think the schmaltz might be going on just a little too thick, scary ghost stuff starts happening.

What I found most entertaining about the pilot episode was the way it time and again made me wonder what it would be like to go through life never knowing if the person sitting across from you is alive or dead... until you realize that you're the only person who can see him. If the show keeps that aspect alive, I think this is going to be lots of fun.

--
Things Learned About Ghosts and The Afterlife in This Episode: Major life-changes for those the departed care about may "awaken" their slumbering, lingering spirits and draw them to the location, even if they don't know why. Ghosts somehow communicate even with the ghosts who are stuck in this world... and sometimes they tell those who are stuck to seek out Melinda for help.

'Gacy House' might be worth visiting

8213: Gacy House (2010)
Starring: Jim Lewis, Matthew Temple, Diana Terranova, Michael Gaglio, Brett A. Newton, Rachel Riley, and Sylvia Panacione
Director: Anthony Fankhauser
Rating: Five of Ten Stars

A group of paranormal investigators (Gaglio, Lewis, Newton, Panacione, Riley, Temple, and Terranova) conduct a ghost hunt in the house built on the site where pedophile and serial killer John Wayne Gacy's home once stood. They find more then they could have imagined in their worst nightmares.

"Gacy House" is a film that will appeal to you if you are a big fan of TV shows like "Ghost Hunters" and found footage hoax movies like "Blair Witch Project". You're also going to be willing to overlook the fact that the film is plagued by numerous instances of characters behaving in ways so mind-blowing idiotic that Stupid Character Syndrome doesn't even come close to describing the degree to which badly considered plot dictates override common sense and logic. (The worst of these: A character who decides to bail on the ghost hunt, yet can't seem to figure out to how to use a cell phone to call a cab or to simply walk away from the haunted house.)

The film is mostly well acted and there aren't many instances where you find yourself groaning at the clumsy attempts at maintaining the illusion of reality... although, personally, the film lost credibility when it tried to present itself as actual police evidence, so I never did manage to suspend my disbelief in regards to the events of the film being real. That said, I did find a couple of moments very well done, such as the one where a character is working both with an infra-red camera and a regular camera, so we get to see a ghost invisible to the naked eye attack him in a clever sort of split-screen effect thanks to monitors.

While not as good as "The Last Exorcism" or "The Blair Witch Project", "Gacy House" is still a far sight better than many other attempts at this sub-genre. Still, it's flawed enough that I am giving it the lowest possible of a Five Star rating, and I think it's probably only of interest to the biggest fans of "found footage" efforts.

'Legend of Sorrow Creek' has a few good moments

The Legend of Sorrow Creek (2007)
Starring: Christina Caron, Freya Ravensbergen, Joe Deitcher, Matt Turner, Stephen Walker, Russell Sangster, and Michelle Caron
Director: Michael Penning
Rating: Four of Ten Stars

Four friends (Caron, Deitcher, Ravensbergen, and Turner) cut through a patch of haunted forest and draw the attention of wrathful spirits.

"Legend of Sorrow Creek" is a well-acted and well-filmed horror movie that shoots for a "Blair Witch Project" sort of vibe within traditional filmmaking approaches instead the "found footage" route. It's a low-budget horror film with a professional look to it, mounted by a director who obviously understood how to work within his means, and which delivers several genuinely scary moments.

However, the film is done is by an underdeveloped script (by director Penning) which relies on the characters behaving in idiotic ways in order to keep the plot moving forward, and which just sort of fizzles to a close (after perhaps the most astounding display of Stupid Character Syndrome ever put on screen) instead of ending with an explosion of horror. Perhaps even more damning, the film has a wrap-around sequence that features its worst actors and lamest dialogue, and which makes little sense in the context of the rest of the movie. I think something like it was needed for the film, but this wasn't it, and it's the most blatant sign that the script needed a lot more attention that it got.

If you like horror films with a "spooky forest" motif, or ones that revolve around "beautiful young people in trouble," this might be a film worth checking out. It's not exactly awful, but the shaky script foundation that supports the respectable efforts of the cast and crew result in a film that's not worth going out of your way for either. (I came across it in a set of eight different movies, among which were gems like "Prom Night", "Below" and four Charles Band productions. and in that context it's harmless filler. But I wouldn't bother with a stand-alone DVD unless you were renting it cheaply.)

'Below' is an ever-changing chiller

Below (2002)
Starring: Bruce Greenwood, Holt McCallany, Olivia Williams, Matt Davis, Nick Chinlund, and Andrew Howard
Director: David Twohy
Rating: Eight of Ten Stars

While on a patrol in the Atlantic during WW2, an American submarine picks up survivors of a strange attack on a medical ship. As they attempt to reach port, the boat comes under attack from a persistent German submarine hunter while seemingly supernatural events start to hinder their efforts to survive.

With "Below", David Twohy does for the war movie what he did for sci-fi with Pitch Black. What starts in the vein of a war drama, soon shifts to an apparent espionage thriller... and eventually morphs into a full-on horror film with the crew of the submarine fighting against a monster outside (the German ship trying its best to send them to the bottom of the sea permanently) and a vengeful ghost within (both an actual supernatural ghost and the guilt harbored by some of the ship's officers surrounding the events that placed Lt. Commander Brice (Greenwood) in the position of acting captain.

With exceptional performances by the entire cast, a clever script that keeps viewers guessing about what is happening and what will come next up to, quite literally, the film's final scene, and excellent special effects, I am left wondering why this film was dumped unceremoniously directly onto the DVD market and quickly relegated to DVD multi-packs. It's a film far more deserving of the obscurity and company it's been relegated to.

If you like war movies and horror movies, "Below" is a film you need to check out.

It's English Settlers vs. Viking Ghosts!

Lost Colony (aka "Wraiths of Roanoke) (2007)
Starring: Adrian Paul, Frida Farrell, Rhett Giles, and Michael Teh
Director: Matt Codd
Rating: Six of Ten Stars

Ananias Dare (Paul) leads a desperate struggle for the survival of his fellow settles in 16th century Roanoke when the colony is set upon by undead Vikings.

"Lost Colony" is a made-for-television spookfest that is loosely based on the mysterious demise of the English Roanoke colony. By the standards I've come to expect from a film from the Sci-Fi Channel (now known by the nonsensical name SyFy Channel), it's a masterpiece. By the standards I apply to horror films in general, it's not bad. It's not great, but it's entertaining.

The acting is serviceable, with Adrian Paul offering his usual Sensitive Hero character and Frida Farrell, as the distressed damsel haunted by evil pagan dreams, leading the cast. None of the characters are particularly deep or all that well-developed, but what we do get is just enough. (Although, having said that, I would have liked to know more about Ananias Dare's connection with Nordic paganism, as it seems like an bit of knowledge to assign to a person whose real-world historical counterpart seems to have been a brick-layer by profession.)

Special effects-wise, the film is also a little better than what I've come to expect from a "Sci-Fi Original", but I did at a couple of points find myself wishing that either more time had been spent rehearsing actors when it came to them sword-fighting with opponents who literally weren't there (as the phantom Vikings they were battling were computer animations added later) or more money and time had been spent on post-production, as there are several points where the fights are less than convincing.

As a period horror film, you can do a lot worse than "Lost Colony". The price is also right, if you pick up in the "Horror 4 Pack Volume 2" which can be found at some retail outlets for as little as $5.

Meat Loaf: 'It's All Coming Back to Me Now'

Here's another fun and spooky video for a fine Jim Steinman song. All music videos should be this entertaining.

'Unborn Sins' is a concept that deserved better

Unborn Sins (2005)
Starring: Michelle L. Harris, Sean Contrearas, Jim Barbour, and Paul "PJ" Peneloza
Director: Elliott Eddie
Rating: Three of Ten Stars

A psychic detective (Contrearas) and his partners attempt to stop the deadly rampage of the spirit of an aborted baby (Peneloza) that has been summoned into the world by cultists so it can take revenge on everyone involved it having it aborted, including its would-have-been mother (Harris).

"Unborn Sins" is one of those movies that has an intriguing idea at its heart--what happens to the souls aborted babies?--that deserved a far better execution than the means available to writer/director/producer Eddie Elliot. With decent sound work, decent lighting, better cinematography, better actors, and a script that had been taken through a draft or two more--or perhaps revised by a more experienced writer--this could have been one chilling movie. As it stands, it's a movie that I really wish I could like more than I do, and a movie that I wish could be remade in stronger hands.

Lighting and sound problems aside, the biggest weakness of its film is its running time. There are several scenes that are near-pointless (such as the one where Harris' repulsive boyfriend dances by himself to rap music for what seems like forever, or the basketball game at the park that likewise went on and on and on) and a subplot involving some sort of kidnapping/drug deal that doesn't have anything to do with anything else in the movie, except that the detective agency was somehow involved with that case. If the film had been tightened up from and its running time of nearly two hours shortened to 80 or 90 minutes, I think it might have rated as much as a 4 on its ideas alone.

(The technical problems and the running time aren't the only problems. There's also quite a bit of unintended hilarity in the film, such as when the obnoxious boyfriend is prowling through his apartment trying to look all Gangsta with a gun in each hand, holding them right next to his face. I kept hoping he'd fire, because watching the ejected cartridge smack him in the face would have been very amusing. Similarly, the Big Fight between the heroes and the angry spirit is more ridiculous than suspenseful because everyone starts behaving as if they just escaped from a Kung Fu movie made in 1973. These elements might make the film worthy of inclusion in the line-up for a Bad Movie Night, so long as you keep in mind there will be long stretches of overly padded scenes.)

"Unborn Sins" is one of the most intriguing films I've ever given a low rating to, and I wish I liked it more than I do. As I said at the top, the whole abortion angle is an intriguing jump-off point for a horror film and I wish this had been a more solid film. Therefore, despite its many flaws, I think it might be worth checking out for those who are able to look at low-budget films with kind eyes and forgiving hearts.

"Unborn Sins" is available as part of the inexpensive "Sinister Souls" 6-movie pack, the even-cheaper-by-the-movie "Tomb of Terrors" 50-movie pack, or as a stand-alone DVD. I think you'll find your money better spent if you acquire it along with 5 (or 49!) other low-budget indie movies. I think it's worth seeing, but it's not worth full price.

Welcome to the Hotel California

"You can check out any time you want, but you can never leave."

"Hotel California" is a great and spooky song that no one has yet fully managed to capture in a video. That's surprising to me as it's a neat little horror story.

Still, here's a video from a creative bunch who made an attempt.



And here's a dancer who states that this performance piece was inspired by the lyrics of "Hotel California". It's spooky enough, but I wonder why she didn't perform to the music of the song? (Yeah, I could ask, but that would be too much like, you know, work.)




In the end, this still holds true:

The house always wins in 'Haunted Casino'

Haunted Casino
(aka "Dead Man's Hand: Casino of the Damned") (2007)
Starring: Robin Sydney, Scott Whyte, Kristyn Green, Wes Armstrong, Lily Rains, Kavan Reece, Sid Haig, Michael Berryman, Jessica Morris, and Rico Simonini
Director: Charles Band
Rating: Five of Ten Stars

After his mobster uncle dies in prison for five murders committed forty years ago, Matthew Dragna (Whyte) inherits his long-closed Las Vegas casino, the Mysteria. Together with four friends (Armstrong, Green, Rains, Reece, and Sydney) he starts restoring the place, hoping to reopen it while preserving its archaic look as a way to revive the spirit of Vegas' early years when the Rat Pack and mobsters ran the show. But, they soon discover that the spirit of mob-ruled Vegas is already very moch alive within the walls of the Mysteria, in the form of long-dead gangster Roy Donahue (Haig)... and he has score to settle with the Dragna family.


"Dead Man's Hand: Casino of the Damned" is a straight-forward, barebones traditional haunted house story. It unfolds quickly, with not a moment of screentime wasted. Unforunately, it's so barebones that several of the characters barely get any development and the ultimate resolution of the plot feels a little rushed and too easy.

Because of its very traditional and straight-forward nature, the film also is fairly scare-free for most of its running time. It's not rated, but I suspect it would be a PG-13 film, and even when compared to other horror films at that level it's tame. Even the teens will be unimpressed, as the first hour unfolds as a steady, but tension-free pace. There's just enough going on to keep your interest, but not much more than that. (The lack of ability for a character to "get it up" and the interaction with his bitchy girlfriend is the most interesting activity during the first part of the movie.)

As for the rest the cast and the film's effects, they're okay. As mentioned above, the actors are all well-cast. I wish the puppetry on the ghosts aside from the slot girl had been a bit more effective, and Sid Haig wasn't as impressive here as he was in "House of 1000 Corpses", but the puppets and his performance were passable.

"Dead Man's Hand: Casino of the Damned" is worth seeing primarily for Simonini and that really cool slot ghost; they earn it a full point on their own, lifting it from a low 4 rating to a medium 5. It's not necessarily a movie I recommend you go our of your way for, but it's got moments that make it worth checking out.

Sometimes a film's best avoided...

Sometimes They Come Back... Again (1996)
Starring: Michael Gross, Hilary Swank, Alexis Arquette, and Jennifer Elise Cox
Director: Adam Grossman
Rating: Three of Ten Stars

When Jon Porter (Gross) returns to his childhood home after the death of his mother, his good-girl teenaged daughter Michelle (Swank) is stalked by the restless spirits of a gang of intensely evil teenaged Satanists, led by Tony Reno (Arquette) he killed as they were killing his sister several decades ago. If Jon is to save his daughter, he needs to kill them... again.

"Sometimes They Come Back... Again" starts out okay but quickly degrades into bad effects and abject stupidity. Even allowing for the standard cast of Stephen King stock characters (the film is based, very loosely, on a short story he wrote, "Sometimes They Come Back") -- the haunted adult who has to face childhood horrors, the 1950s-style tough-guys who are still around as ghosts, the innocent child of the main character who is now being menaced by the dark past, the village idiot, the desperate cleric, and so on--the characters and events here are generally so over the top that it becomes impossible for the viewer to suspend disbelief. And the awful "electricity effects" doesn't help one bit.

It also doesn't help that the only decent actors in the piece are Gross and Swank. On one hand, it's good, because the father/daughter relationship is key to the film's story. On the other hand, it's bad, because whenever they're acting against other players, they show how bad everyone else is.

Truly hardcore Stephen King fans might enjoy this film. The rest of us can just watch it for the beauty that is Hilary Swank...

'The Demons of Ludlow' is one of Rebane's best

The Demons of Ludlow (1975)
Starring: Paul von Hausen, Stephanie Cushna, Carol Perry, James R. Robinson, C. Dave Davis, and Angailica
Director: Bill Rebane
Rating: Four of Ten Stars

A curse that's haunted a small New England town since its founding two hundred years ago is brought fully to horrible life when a piece of its secret history--a piano that sounds like a harpsichord (or is that a harpsichord that looks like an upright piano?)--resurfaces. Will the town preacher (Von Hausen) and a pair of young journalists (Cushna and Robinson) stop the curse, or will they fall victim to it?

I watched several of Bill Rebane's movies, and I don't know whether my ability to tell crap from quality started to erode when I got to this one, but I think that "The Demons of Ludlow" is actually pretty good for a low-budget horror film. Compared to some of Rebane's other efforts, it's downright brilliant.

Unfortunately, like another of Rebane's almost-good movies--"The Game" (aka "The Cold")--he and his writers simply can't seem to pull off the ending. Remember my question im the summary above as to whether the preacher and the journalist escape the curse? That remains a question at the end of the movie, and it's not a question that hangs there in a good way. The ending is so abrupt that seems as though Rebane ran out of film and had no money to buy more. The film simply feels like the ending was left off.

If a little more care had been taken to construct a story with a decent end, this could have been a solid 5 rating. The soundtrack is decent, the acting is better than most of what you see in films of this kind, and there are even some pretty scary scenes--the sequences where the preacher's alcoholic wife is being tormented by the ghosts' of Ludlow's past are particularly well done. But, again, Rebane screws up the ending.

'Trailer Park of Terror' is trashy, gory fun

Trailer Park of Terror (2008)
Starring: Nichole Hiltz, Jeanette Brox, Brock Chuchna, Stefanie Black, Matthew Del Negro, and Trace Adkins
Director: Steven Goldman
Rating: Six of Ten Stars

When a bus-load of troubled teens on a church retreat crash during a rain-storm, the passengers and their chaparone (Del Negro) take refuge at a nearby trailer park. Unfortunately for them, the trailer park is merely the ghostly reflection of a murderous den of hillbilly criminals that died in a gory, revenge-fueled massacre decades earlier. They now re-inact their brutal ways on hapless travelers, under the command of Norma (Hiltz), one of their victims who has turned victimizer thanks to a deal with the devil (Adkins).

"Trailer Park of Terror" has something for just about every horror fan. It takes nearly every disgusting thing you've seen in a Killer Hicks movie from the 1970s forward and combines them with a sadistic sense of humor that will put you in mind films like "Spider Baby" and "Re-Animator", as well as slightly more modern off-kilter horror features like "From Dusk 'Til Dawn". Further, the ghosts mostly manifest themselves as disgusting walking corpses, so lovers of zombie films will have something to sink their metaphorical teeth into, while admirers of Torture Porn flicks will get to watch one victim get her arm sawed off while tripping so high she doesn't notice until after the fact, and another victim is turned into jerky meat while still alive. And then there's the horny teens that are forced to be the stars of a snuff flick.

I'm not a big fan of mean-spirited and sadistic horror films, so there was quite a bit about "Trailer Park of Terror" I didn't care for. I also like my gory ghost movies and slasher flicks to have a "morality tale" aspect to them, and when they don't--or it's a weak part of the film, as it is here--the film invariably loses me, so that was another reason for me not to like this flick.

However, this thing is so well-written and so finely acted by everyone involved that I couldn't help but like it. Virtually all the characters are so purely one-note and cliched with the hillbilly ghosts  that combining them all in one place manages to breath a form of demented freshness into the film--the writers didn't even try to expand the victims beyond horny teen, asshole teen, druggie teen, and so on; nor to give the ghosts more definition than rapist redneck, robber redneck, cannibal redneck, and so on.

The only character with even the slightest depth to her is Norma, who in life was the only non-psychotic inhabitant of the trailer park... at least until she decided she had enough of them and gunned them all down and killed herself. But the facets to the Norma character never manifests itself quite in the way one expects as the film unfolds, something which becomes which is highlighted and becomes even more interesting due to the plethora of one-note stereotypes that otherwise inhabit the film. It also helps, of course, that Hiltz is a better actress than her repeated casting as a white-trash bimbo (here, and in the television series "The Riches" and "In Plain Sight") warrants. I'd like to see in more horror movies, and in different roles than what she seems to be playing over and over.

The only real down-side that I saw to this film is its somewhat disorganized structure. It starts with an extended sequence in the past and then interrupts the present with a couple of extended flashbacks that both fill in back story but also stand alone to some extent, giving the film the fell of a half-baked anthology. Given the film is based on the anthology comic book series "Trailer Park of Terror", I understand why the filmmakers wanted to make a nod in the direction of their source, but I just wish they had done it in a less choppy fashion.

In the final analysis, though, "Trailer Park of Terror" is well worth watching.

'Drag Me to Hell' is a spectacular spook show

Drag Me to Hell (2009)
Starring: Alison Lohman, Justin Long, Dileep Rao, Lorna Raver, David Paymer, and Reggie Lee
Director: Sam Raimi
Rating: Nine of Ten Stars

When a loan officer hoping for a promotion at the bank (Lohman) forecloses on an old gypsy woman's house, she is put under a terrible curse: She has three days to find a way to reverse it, or a powerful demon will drag her bodily to Hell.


"Drag Me to Hell" is the sort of horor movie that most filmmakers seem incapable of making these days. It's a got a to-the-point script with a well-constructed story, it's got characters the audience can root for (despite their flaws) and, most importantly, it's got plenty of scares. It's a horror movie the likes of which we haven't seen on the big screen since... well, "Cursed" came close, but it was moreof a classic monster movie than a horror fim. This one is a throwback to a time when horror movies were actually good!

In fact, the film even acknowledges it's a reminder of a lost time for horror fillms by starting with the Universal logo from the 1970s and 1980s. And what follows is a film with the spirit of those days but in a thoroughly modern body. Whether you love the movies from back then--like me--or whether you're a kid who has only been exposed to the garbage and crappy remakes that are being passed off as horror movies today, this is a movie you'll get a kick out of.

With its well-mounted scares and finely crafted script, this is a movie that was made with care from the very beginning. It's enhanced even further by excellent performances by every featured actor, with star Alison Lohman earning every dime she was paid to be in this film.

Fans of Raimi's first big hit, "The Evil Dead", are also well-served by this film. It is, literally, the first time that Raimi returns to a movie of that kind. Like the "The Evil Dead", the film starts as a fairly standard horror flick, but then goes crazily over the top as it reaches its climax. But, with 30 years of experience under his belt, this return to the style of that first outing is far more effective than he's ever done it before. (He sort of did it with "Evil Dead 2", but that was a horror-comedy from the outset and was actually very different from both what he did in the original film and what he does here.)

If you're one of those people who habitually turn their nose up at PG-13 horror movies because their not intense enough for you, and therefore haven't seen this film yet, you need to get over your bad self, or at least check out the "unrated director's cut". This is one of the very best big studio horror releases in the past decade, and it gives me hope that maybe there is still a future for the horror film on the big screen. (But don't just take my word for it. The people who put together the countdown show "Chiller 13: The Scariest Movie Moments of the Decade" include several scenes from the film on their list. The show premieres tonight, Friday, on the Chiller cable channel. Check your local listings.)

The Complete Night Stalker, Part Four

"Kolchak: The Night Stalker" is a show that many people my age think fondly of, half-remembering episodes that scared the bejeezus out of us as kids. Viewing the entire series as an adult, I found that there were many episodes that warrant those warm feelings. However, as I continue my survey of all 20 episodes in the series as part of the 31 Nights of Halloween, I it is clear that today's batch represent the series at its height.

If the majority of the show had been as good as Episodes Thirteen through Sixteen, and if ABC and Universal  Television executives had dealt more fairly with star Darrin McGavin (instead of reneging on promises of creative control and co-producer status of the series), maybe it would have earned a second season.

Kolchak: The Night Stalker
(The Complete Television Series Reviewed, Part Four)

Episode Thirteen: Primal Scream
Rating: Six of Ten Stars
Director: Robert Scheerer

A trail of brutal dismemberment murders that start at a research lab analyzing core samples retrieved from the North Pole brings Kolchak face-to-face with savage man-apes that have spontenously regenerated from thawed-out cells.

This episode is pure scientific nonsense of 1950s monster-movie variety. In think even in the 50s, audiences would have rolled their eyes at the notion of life-forms as complicated as a meat-eating primate regenerating from a few single cells. What makes this episode fun is Carl's interaction with the incidental characters and the supporting cast back at the INS office. Ron in particular gets to shine in this episode.

The monster here is lame, and Carl's heedless pursuit of a creature that is so plainly dangerous to whomever it comes across is pure idiocy (even by Kolchak Standards) but the non-monster related interaction definately saves this episode.


Episode Fourteen: The Trevi Collection
Rating: Nine of Ten Stars
Director: Don Weis

Before a source can give Carl a promised scoop, the source is murdered. As Carl investigates, he uncovers disturbing facts about the House of Trevi, a ritzy fashion design studio: The lady it's named after is witch, and deadly curses are being tossed left, right, and center... at anyone who seems to threaten the supremecy of Trevi. And that includes Our Man Carl.

This is one of my very favorite episodes, despite the somewhat dubious way Carl is drawn into the situation. I love the way the story's many twists and the way Carl's gung-ho monster-hunting attitude (where he blazes ahead without having all his facts straight) ends up making the situation far more deadly. A subplot about mobsters chasing Carl for information also adds a lot to this episode.

The episode is also enlivened by a guest appearance by Lara Parker as the fashion designing witch who will let nothing stand between her and success. She is so good that I may down the "Dark Shadows" movies she starred in.


Episode Fourteen: Chopper
Rating: Eight of Ten Stars
Director: Bruce Kessler

Aging, former members of an outlaw biker gang are being murdered, all decapitated by an impossibly strong killer. Kolchak investigates, and then he becomes the next target of a headless ghost biker who has come back from the dead for revenge.

This is one of the great "Night Stalker" episodes. There's plenty of horror and plenty of laughs in this excellently written episode. The tension remains high until the very moment--there hasn't been such a strong sense of danger for Kolchak since "The Zombie".

This could have been a Ten-Star episode if not for the absolute laziness with which the headless biker was created. I realize it was the 70s, they didn't have the sort of computer effects we have today, and television budgets and shooting schedules were tight, but there MUST have been a better way to do the biker ghost than just have a stunt driver pull his jacket over his head. In life, the biker just have been known as "Johnny Long Torso" because his chest is about one-head length too big.

This bit of shoddiness undermines what could have been a truly great episode.


Episode Fifteen: Demon in Lace
Rating: Six of Ten Stars
Director: Don Weis

Young men are being frightened to death on a college campus. Kolchak traces the cause back to an ancient tablet and the demon who dwells within it. Will anyone believe that a priceless historical treasure must be destroyed before any more lives are lost?

This is a solid, middle-of-the-road episode. The story is okay and well thought out--it even provides a reason for why Carl isn't fired and/or locked up for good at the end--and there's a nice balance of humor and horror as a frustrated Kolchak battles not only the police and college campus bureacrats, but also has to contend with a journalism student who shares many of his worst personality traits. It's funny to see Carl get a dose of his own medicine.


Episode Sixteen: Legacy of Terror
Rating: Seven of Ten Stars
Director: Don McDougall

Someone armed with a dull blade has been cutting out the hearts of physically-perfect men and women, killing each victim is found on a higher and higher prime numbered flight of stairs. Kolchak's investigation puts him at odds with bizarre Aztec cult seeking to revive their mummified god at the correct celestial alignment. To prevent the mummy's resurrection, Kolchak must prevent the sacrifice of their fifth, "perfect" victim on the highest flight of stairs in Chicago.

This is one of the better episodes as it features a high creepiness factor, high humor factor, and there's a strong sense that Kolchak may be in over his head during the climax, but the lengths to which the writers go to make their story believable (by filling the viewer in on details regarding Aztec mythology) sometimes gives it a feeling of a doctoral thesis gone waaaay of the rails. Still, it's an etertaining, fast-paced, and exciting episode. The cult/conspiracy angle it takes also strengthens it immensely; the supernatural monster doesn't appear until the very end.

(Speaking of the monster, the final shot of the mummy shows its eyes flicker a bit. I'm not sure if that's sloppy editing or intentional, but it was certainly startling, since Carl was certain he'd prevented the gods resurrection... at least until the stars align again.)










Please join me again next week, as I finish the trip through all 20 episodes of "Kolchak: The Night Stalker", just in time for the monster explosion that is Halloween!

'Dead Dudes in the House' should stay there

Dead Dudes in the House (1991)
Starring: Mark Zobian and Naomi Kooker
Directors: J. Rifflel and Edgar Lewis
Rating: Four of Ten Stars

A group of 20-something men and women set out to restore a decaying mansion that one of them have bought for an amazingly low price. As they get ready for work, one of them maliciously breaks a tombstone in the backyard, and, in doing so, awakens a pair of malevolent spirits that inhabit the house. What follows is a night of terror as our protagonists are stalked and killed one by one. They don't stay dead for long, though...

"Dead Dudes in the House" is a so-so low-budget effort that's a cross between a slasher flick and a haunted house movie. While I have the sense that the filmmakers never been within three miles of anyone involved with renovating a house, they did create a film that distinguishes itself with having a rare set of horror movie main characters that generally behaved as though they actually had brains in their heads.

As a "killer in the house" slasher movie, "Dead Dudes" works pretty well. The victims even try to keep in a group rather than splitting up! As a ghost film, it is somewhat lacking.

The film never gives us any good reason for WHY the ghosts are bent on killing everyone who enters the house, including a couple of teen boys who get added late in the film. (Okay, so they oogle the ghost of the daughter, but that's hardly a reason since she invites them to do so.) The reason might be "because they're insane"--terrible things did happen to the women who haunt the house--but I'm not sure that reason holds up. In any case, there's no explanation for why their victims reanimate as homicidal killers themselves. (Although... I suppose this means "Dead Dudes" was ahead of its time, because the ghosts in the Japanese and American sequels to "The Grudge" seem to be likewise poorly motivated.)

Maybe I'm just thinking too hard, but I would probably have given this film another Star if it had given me a satisfactory answer to those questions.





(This is one of the movies featured in 150 Movies You Should (Die Before You) See. It's one of better efforts spotlighted in the "Terrible Monster Movies" chapter.

'The Terror' is borderline terrible

The Terror (aka "Lady of Shadows", "The Castle of Terror", and "The Haunting") (1964)
Starring: Jack Nicholson, Sandra Knight, and Boris Karloff
Director: Roger Corman
Rating: Four of Ten Stars

A French officer (Nicholson) during Napoleon's campaigns encounters a mysteriously alluring woman, Helene (Knight). Everyone denies she exists, but when he tracks her to the isolated, crumbling castle of Baron Von Lepp (Karloff), he discovers the girl may be ghost.


"The Terror" is basically pretty awful, and it shows every sign of having been made up as filming took place--the number of times where a character/actor seems completely oblivious to what he supposedly just experienced in the previous scenes far outnumber the times when there's continuity between scenes--it takes forever to get going, the dialogue is awful and repetitive, and the film can't seem to make up its mind what the nature of Helene is. (This waffling goes far beyond the filmmakers wanting to keep the audience guessing.) However, there's enough here that if you enjoy classic horror flicks, you'll keep watching.

Unfortunately, just as the movie starts getting good, the filmmakers throw in what is perhaps the dumbest and most pointless "twist" to ever be committed to film. It is so lame that it almost cost the film an entire Tomato in my rating. (It earned it back, however, with the very startling final scene.)

"The Terror" is better than many Roger Corman movies, but not as good as the Edgar Allen Poe films that it uses stock footage and sets from. If you're a lover of Amicus, AIP, and Hammer Films from the 50s and 60s, I think you might find something worthwhile here, but otherwise, I recommend you take a pass. (For the record, I was torn between giving it 4 or 5 Stars... it teeters on the brink between those two.

"The Terror" is available on DVD from a number of different distributors, but I think it's only worth getting if it's part of a multi-movie set. Unfortunately, virtually every copy of the film I've come across has been lacking the one element that might have lifted the viewing experience a bit--the vibrant colors of the original set and costume designs. All the DVD copies available seem to have been made from faded and worn prints. (For a look at what "The Terror" could look like, we have to turn to "Targets," as the clips from the movie-within-the-movie are actually scenes from "The Terror.")

'Shutter' director didn't know when to quit

Shutter (2008)
Starring: Joshua Jackson, Rachel Taylor, and Megumi Okina
Director: Masayuki Ochiai
Rating: Four of Ten Stars

A fashion photographer (Jackson) and his wife (Taylor) are on a working honeymoon in Japan when his past literally comes back to haunt him. The ghost of a woman he dated years earlier (Okina) starts appearing in photos he takes and manifesting in increasingly threatening ways.


"Shutter" is for most of its running time a fairly decent ghost movie that is a nice cross-pollination between Western and Eastern ideas about the what, why, and how of hauntings and vengeful spirits. Unfortunately, it starts to break down as the story builds to the Great Reveal when the girlfriend is shown to have been dead for several years yet no-one has checked on her... despite the fact her front door has been standing open for all that time.

(I suppose one could argue that the ghost has been wandering around the house and neighborhood so no one knew she was dead. But does that mean she also went and got a job at another firm after she had died? What about friends and family? The way the discovery of Megumi's corpse was handled in the film was such an extreme example of bad writing that I've knocked off a whole point on the ratings scale.)

In all other aspects, the film is very well done. The filmmakers make a particularly excellent use of sound throughout the movie, using it to enhance suspense in subtle ways as well as during the film's few "Boo!"-type moments. The lighting and cinematography is likewise very well done. The script is also well-written, and I was particularly happy to see they did more with the denouement than the now-expected "let's toss in one more scare." (In fact, what you THINK is the denouement is actually the beginning of the film's true ending.)

The acting is all-around decent, although I would have liked to have seen a slightly more sympathetic and charming actor playing Ben Shaw, the photographer who is the focus of the ghost's attention. Joshua Jackson has a villainous air about hm that never quite allows the viewer to be on his side. If the actor playing Ben had been just a little more charismatic, the sense of horror and dread in this film would have been ar stronger, particularly at the end.

"Shutter" is worth seeing if you enjoy ghost movies, so long as you can accept an annoying instance of no one thinking a particular sequence through. It's high on creepiness but low on blood, so gore hounds should stay away. (Oh, and if you're sick of the whole "isn't long black hair really creepy?!?" standard in these sorts of movies, you'll be glad to hear that we DON'T have that particular trope to sit through here. We got the pale, barefooted ghost chick, but at least her hair isn't everywhere!)